Monday, November 26, 2007

Just Another Blonde Joke

A body builder picks up a blonde at a bar and takes her home with
him.

He takes off his shirt and the blonde says,
"What a great chest you have."
The body builder tells her, "That's 100 lb. of dynamite, baby."
He takes off his pants and the blonde says,
"What massive calves you have."
The body builder tells her, "That's 100 lb. of dynamite, baby."

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running out of the
a partment screaming in fear.
The body builder puts his clothes back on and chases after her.
He catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment like
that.
The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite
after I saw how short the fuse was."

Friday, November 23, 2007

Oops!!!




A nice quiet night was interrupted when my nephew wanted to show me how he could hide a penny in his mouth. After some begging and bribing, I was almost able to convince him to spit the penny out. As I went in for an attempt to grab it, Brycen swallowed it because he didn't want me to get it. LMAO!!! As me and Charlie took him to the ER, we had him beleiving that the Drs would have to cut his stomach open to get the penny. As he sat on the Xray table and screamed as the Xray came dow, we finally told him its ok and the Dr will not cut him open.
***Note to Parents....Don't try to make your child regurgitate after swallowing a non-food item. The ER doctor said its better to let the swallowed item run thru the bowels if it is not poisonous.***

Sunday, November 4, 2007

A slight Mis-Understanding

Lulu was a prostitute.

One day there was a raid.

All the prostitutes were lined up outside the police station as they took them in one by one.

As Lulu stood in line, she saw her Grandma coming down the street and was so ashamed, Grandma didn't know her occupation.

Grandma stopped to say hi, and asked what the line was for.

Lulu, saving face, said that the police were giving away fresh oranges to those waiting.

Grandma said wonderful, she loved oranges and got at the end of the line.

When the policeman got to the end and saw her, he was amazed.

He said, "How the heck do you do this at your age?"

She said "I just take out my teeth, rip the skin back and suck 'em dry!"

The cop fainted............

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Joke of the Day

Lulu was a prostitute.

One day there was a raid.

All the prostitutes were lined up outside the police station as they took them in one by one.

As Lulu stood in line, she saw her Grandma coming down the street and was so ashamed, Grandma didn't know her occupation.

Grandma stopped to say hi, and asked what the line was for.

Lulu, saving face, said that the police were giving away fresh oranges to those waiting.

Grandma said wonderful, she loved oranges and got at the end of the line.

When the policeman got to the end and saw her, he was amazed.

He said, "How the heck do you do this at your age?"

She said "I just take out my teeth, rip the skin back and suck 'em dry!"

The cop fainted............

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Dentist Check-Up

Jordan managed to get a clean bill of health.

After a somewhat traumatic experience with his first cavity, Jordan managed to have no cavities. And yes, daddy rewarded him for the positive outcome and saving money too.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

New Addition




So I broke down and gave in.

We got a dog for Jordan. The lil wirey haired dog was given to him on his 4th birthday.

Just after I got done potty training one kid, another comes along.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Good Parenting




My cute lil neice is growing up. Here is a picture of proud father with his daughter.

Friday, September 28, 2007

What was he thinking???

It makes no sense that the US Women's Coach would keep a 1st string goalie on the bench during an important game. Hope had gone over 300 minutes without allowing a goal. (That is almost 4 games, 3 of which were shut outs)

Brianna made the start against Brazil because 3 years ago she helped the US defeat Brazil. Why didn't the coach pull her out after the 2nd goal.

Keep your head up Hope. We love you!!!


Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Child Abuse!!!





Not Really, But.....

Jordan being young and nieve decided to follow his mom to the nail salon to get a pedicure. Hopefully this habit won't continue

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Washing the Dishes



Finally!!! Jordan has learned to do the dishes. It makes life a bit easier.
Next.....the laundry???