My Exciting Life

Joke of the Day

2009-03-12T19:59:00.001-06:00

An elderly man in North Carolina had owned a large farm for several years.

He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

As he came closer , he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned and replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked." Holding the bucket up he said,

"I'm here to feed the alligator."

Moral: Old men can still think fast.

Skin Cancer and Caffeine

2009-02-27T09:19:00.002-07:00

Very Interesting Article!! Enjoy

http://health.yahoo.com/news/healthday/caffeinemayoffersomeskincancerprotection.html

From the Secret Faults

2009-02-14T22:58:00.004-07:00

I was going thru some boxes of pictures that were recent recovered from an undiscoled location. They had been missing since my mom passed avay in 2002. Luckily they were in prefect condition.

How times have changed? I finally grew into my body, Heather got rid of her dresses, Paddy shaved the mop, and Biddy became a thru P I M P!!!

The Dirty Deeds Exposed

2009-02-01T11:35:00.003-07:00

It seems like the dirty deeds of the Big Banks that received government bailout money are finally coming to light. It’s a shame that they were not exposed prior to the raping of the tax payers.

The Big Banks are dumbfounded as to why they have lost millions and continue to do so. Part of their problem is "karma" is catching up to them. They are finally getting what they deserve.

How can they screw us Americans by unethical practices, but then expect the people they have screwed to give them money to bail themselves out of the mess? These big Banks can layoff American workers and then turn around and attempt to bring in foreign workers at a "discounted" salary. They can conveniently pay millions of dollars in bonuses to undeserving executives prior to cashing their bailout checks

I found the below news story just another reason to stop giving these dumbasses more money. It’s like they are being rewarded for their stupidity!

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=153&sid=5476398

Oneyla Juliet Wolfe

2009-01-25T22:08:00.002-07:00

Making her entrance Saturday January 24 @ 9:50am. She topped the scales @ 8 lbs 6 oz and 19 in long.

Laugh of the Day

2009-01-17T22:34:00.004-07:00

Happy New Year 2009

2009-01-02T11:41:00.004-07:00

I have never understood the big fuss about making New Year's Resolutions. About half of the world will attempt to make some type of New Year Resolution. Now research has shown that by the end of January 1/3 of the resolutions will be ignored or forgotten and by mid-year only about 1/4 of the resolutions will be actively worked on. IMO, I think people make unrealistic or unattainable goals. We should start small and progressively set bigger goals.

As for me, I plan on setting 1-3 reasonable goals. One of my lofty goals will be to attempt to get my Fat Ass in shape. The below picture will be my motivation.

Christmas 2008

2008-12-28T20:37:00.006-07:00

Another fun filled Christmas weekend comes to an end. The Christmas of 2008 turned out to be a good one for the boys.

My favorite present was given to me from Jordan...Duct Tape.

2 Bailouts down....How many more to go? Its anyones guess?

2008-12-21T19:00:00.003-07:00

It was no surprise that the government approved another corporate bailout for the domestic automakers. Of course it was much smaller than the one the banks received, but still it came at the cost of the hard working American taxpayers. It goes to show that these companies are not management effectively. A company should be prepared for tough times and not expect Uncle Sam to help them out due to lack of fiscal planning

I think it would be better suited for the government to help the taxpayers that are keeping this debt ridden nation afloat. Why is it that big Corporate Executives can continue to draw large salaries/bonuses, use private jets and other luxury wants but come crawling to the government for money. Yes, it sounds like the government welfare program that continues to provide for lazy people that refuse to work or find ways to make money that is undetected to the government and have the government help them live high on the hog.

Maybe these corporations that are begging for money should tighten their belts and slash waste. Stop giving bonuses and stock options when the company's performance does not warrant it. The executives that are making unexcuseable large salaries should take a pay cut to help the company save money. You don’t need millions of dollars a year to feed your family of 4.

REMEMBER ALL YOU HARD WORKING AMERICANS, KEEP WORKING MILLION OF AMERICANS ARE DEPENDING ON US SO THEY CAN CONTINUE TO BE LAZY AND RIP THE GOVERNEMENT OFF AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF US.

Watch Out!!!

2008-12-11T21:22:00.002-07:00

I wanted to share this clip from a recent soccer game I attended. Keep your eye on what happens to the ball when it goes out of bounds and is put back into play

Stupid People and Guns

2008-12-11T21:01:00.010-07:00

With the recent news of another sports figure involved with a gun incident. I thought I would share the below clip. Maybe there is a good reason politicians are lobbying for stricter gun control and laws. Make sure you turn up the volume before viewing this clip!

http://splodetv.com/video/gun-accident-compilation

OOOOPPPPSSSS!!!!

2008-12-02T18:48:00.002-07:00

Trying to follow in his mother's footsteps, Jordan made a failed attempt to trim his bangs. Better luck next time!!!

Hold on!!! Here we go!!!

2008-11-30T16:36:00.003-07:00

If the current economic recession we are experiencing is not enough. We now have to deal with the rising cost of health insurance. I can’t argue that health insurance is not necessary. Given my families medical history it’s a must for me and my siblings.

After reading a few articles, I am dumb founded as to why the cost of health insurance is rising at unseen before levels. What is contributing to the rise....greed, lazy people on welfare? Inflation is only 2-3.5% yearly. It is hard for hard working Americans to keep up. Workers are now paying $1,400 more in annual in healthcare premiums for family coverage than they did in 2000. It is no wonder why there is a growing number of uninsured Americans.

Some national surveys show that the primary reason people are uninsured is the high cost of health insurance coverage. Nearly 47 million Americans are uninsured; the United States still spends more on health care than any other industrialized nation.
Premiums for employer-based health insurance rose by 6.1 percent in 2007. Small employers saw their premiums jump as well with an increase 5.5 percent. Smaller businesses with less than 24 workers saw a larger increase of 6.8 percent.

Health care spending is 4.3 times the amount spent on national defense. Hopefully Barry and his band of merry men and women can help once he takes office Jan 20 2009

And that is a Wrap!

2008-11-19T23:47:00.004-07:00

With the RSL Season ending in a loss to the Red Bulls at the Western Conference finals, one was to wonder what if. What would have happened if RSL didnt have 4 shots ping off the goal posts? They would be playing Columbus.

All n All it was a good game to watch. The best part was I had the oppurtunity to sit next to Marcelo Balboa and help with stats. It was a once in a lifetime oppurtunity.

Another DAMN Bailout!!!

2008-11-19T23:32:00.002-07:00

I am interested to see which industry will be next to beg the government for money. Airlines, Transportation, Healhcare....... It seems like its turning out to be Corporate Welfare at its finest. How the hell can the executives of the financial and automaker industries beg for money to keep their businesses aflost when they are receiving millions in compensation and perks??? Its just like the lazy asses that dont need welfare, but want to live the comfortable live so they learn how to play the system. Yet, its the hardworking people that are honset and pay their taxes that have to pay for this stupidity. Maybe if the executives took at paycut and were paid by the perfornace of their companies, they wouldnt need to be begging for the government to bail them out.

Not all Churches are Created Equally!!!

2008-11-14T14:49:00.001-07:00

I thought that the Mormon Tabernacle Choir was the best church choir out there until I visited this church. Enjoy!!!

See more funny videos and TBT Videos at Today's Big Thing.

My Dear Sweet Boys

2008-11-11T12:06:00.004-07:00

As Christmas is approaching, we got dragged out for our yearly picture taking trip.
We managed to get a few good poses from the boys. We are selling prints, all funds will go towards their trust funds.....kidding.

Time for a Change!!!

2008-11-07T10:16:00.002-07:00

I was happy with the outcome of the recent election, not because Barry won, but how he did it. It was not easy to convience the American people that he was capable of taking on the task of President-Elect. Given how blacks have been treated over the years and the misconceptions some people have had. To be trusted as the First Black President of the United States of America, is an enormous feat to have accomplished.

I think it goes to show that we helping Dr. MLK Jr's sppech come true.

"I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal."

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

My Worse Nightmare!!!

2008-10-16T21:12:00.007-06:00

Jordan recently had a huge birthday bash to celebrate 5 years on Earth. As family and friends showered him with gifts, one gift hit me hard. As Uncle Paddy presented a gift to Jordan, I watched in horror as Jordan opened his present. I was speechless, I wanted to puke. My wonderful, thoughtful Sister-In-Law bought Jordan a Lebron James #23 jersey. Yes, this is the same number made famous by his Airness-Michael Jordan.

As my son will learn and have to decide from good and evil, the tug-o-war begins. Who will convince Jordan what player's jersey he will want to wear? So far, Kristy has gained an edge....for now

Change is Good

2008-10-11T18:42:00.003-06:00

My view on my 6th Floor perch during RSL soccer games has changed. With the recent move to RIO TINTO Stadium the Press Box is a mere 4 floors up, quite the change.
I think the new stadium is much better suited for soccer games. I am not sure the hassle and the hagling over public funds was worth it. Hopefully RSL and the Soccer haters (you know who you are) will be able to kiss and make up. The time will come with Utah will be the soccer Utopia of the West. Some day............

Its been that long???

2008-10-02T21:40:00.002-06:00

Its been 6 years, since our sweet mom passed away. As i sat in the hospital that October night I would have never guess things would have played out like they did. I am very grateful for my family and friends who have stood by my side and helped me cope. My siblings have managed to grow and make mom proud.

Today, I took Jordan to the cemetary to give mom flowers. Jordan has never known mom, just through stories has learned what a great woman she is. So I was a bit taken back when he told me he wanted some time alone with Grandma. So he sat quietly by the headstone. then when he was ready to go, bent down and kissed the headstone and quietly waked a way.

Just one more thing to Love

2008-10-01T15:37:00.002-06:00

I am not making this point to start a political debate, just pointing out a good fact about the Obama-Biden push to the White House. IMO....our President and VP should be educated people. Regardless of where they received their papers, I want to be comfortable knowing that they are educated and can manage the country. Given that current state of the economy, we need some!!

Obama-Harvard (J.D., Magna Cum Laude) Biden-Syracuse U. (J.D.) McCain-U.S. Naval Academy (Rank 894 out of 899) Palin-U of Idaho(B.A. Journalism.

Now I prefer to have someone who graduated at the top of their class rather than the bottom. Dont you? That right there shows the motivation and dedication they had.

WTH is up with BFF

2008-09-29T17:40:00.005-06:00

was getting another reality show. If her singing career and show with that anorexic daughter of Lionel Richie wasn’t enough. Now we have to be bombarded with ads about her new show MY NEW BFF. C'mon.....Does a hotel heiress really need help finding friends or even BFFs. I am sure after the elections Sarah Palin will be in need of a new BFF.

WTF......She needs to focus her time and energy in making a different in the world. Save the trees, whales, Red-Footed Lemur. Someone of her caliber and wealth needs to put her money and time to good use. The last thing the viewing public wants to see is some blonde bimbo prancing around the TV screen. We need more quality TV shows.

Sportmanship

2008-09-27T22:19:00.003-06:00

Being a good Sportman and Sportsmanship.....IMO it goes beyond the textbook definition: " as fairness, courtesy, being a cheerful loser."

I bring this up becuase, Today as with most Saturdays I had the opportunity to go play co-ed soccer at a local indoor facility. The team I am currently on is not the greatest, but suffices until my knee is back to 100%. Well....the team we played against a (green) team that had about 15 people to our 8. We were up for the challenge. No sooner had the game started than we netted 3 goals. I have never played against a more pathetic team. A the game progressed, the one-eyed ref continuously favored the other team by not calling fouls for hand balls, flying elbows or a combo of other tactics used to gain the upper hand.

It was not our fault that the other team sucked and were no better than a groups of 12 yr olds. You would think that by paying the ref to call the game in your favor was enough...it wasn’t. Should one be a poor sport if they or their team suck and continously lose? Gracefully lose and we a shining example of what a good sportman is. Instead of calling out to direct and motivate team members, the green team was complaining. If my team even bumped a player on the green team they were all over the ref. These people needed a lesson in how to lose gracefully.....I think there is a book by Al Davis (Raiders Owner) on this topic.

I think my team was a perfect example of true sportsmanship. After all we were fair enough to let them score twice so they wouldn’t leave without scoring. We barely managed to walked away with an 11-2 victory. I won MVP of the game due to my acrobatic leap to block a shot and manage to get a knee in the back at the same time.
Now that is a perfect example of a true sportsman....taking one for the team to protect the slim lead we had.

Sound Off!!!

2008-09-22T09:16:00.005-06:00

I almost choked on my PopTart Sunday morning when I heard the Federal Gov was earmarking $700 billion dollars over the next few years to buy "toxic" assets of the large troubled US Banks. WTH!!!..$700 billion, that is about equal to the combined net worth of the 15 Richest people in the world.

I can see why the government is getting involved to protect the economy, but at what expense to the citizens and hard working taxpayers. It seems that the big cats that run these financial institutions have little or no blame when it comes to chaotic problems as the ones plaguing the financial markets and economy right now. If anything they are fired or "forced" to resign, but they don’t leave broken. Most of these individuals are given a nice golden parachute, so they will never be poor or go broke. And all of this is at the expense of us poor folk.

It seems that the government will promise money to any large Fortune 500 company, even if they dont have it. I can understand why the governement is trying to help soften the blow that the credit crunch is causing and to avoid "toxic" or troubled assets from flooding the markets. Their help...at what cost? Look at the national debt. As of September 2008, the government’s debt was a staggering $9.7 trillion. TRILLION...Not billion or Million. This figures out to be about $32,000 per capita. So while the government is underfunding SS, Medicare/Medicaid and other important programs, they have no problem handing out $700B to banks and financial intuitions who have been poorly managed. Maybe the government needs to pass laws that protect things like this happening again. I doubt it.

I am finished ranting...I will step off my soap box. God Bless America....Go Cowboys!!!

A Fond Farewell

2008-09-20T23:38:00.002-06:00

Tonight was a bittersweet moment as time at RES came to a close. With RSL finishing the final touches on their expensive, state-of-art stadium, RSL played their finally game at the stadium. After 4 tumultuous years, that saw a dozens of players come and go, 2 coaches, GoldBalls with Real Madrid and LA, and a World Cup Qualifier, RSL bid farewell to RES. The experiences and sites seen over these years are memorable and will never be forgotten. I hope my view at the next stadium will be just as nice.

Eating Is Hard Work

2008-09-20T14:42:00.002-06:00

Now that Carter has broken the 1 yr mark and is able to eat normal food. he has been spending some extra time practicing to be a competive eater. Some of his conditioning sessions break into his early evening nap time.

Gone Fishing!!!

2008-09-11T19:36:00.007-06:00

There comes a time in every child’s life where they need to have the chance to go fishing. In our family, Paddy is the Master Fisherman. So when Jordan came to me and wanted me to teach him to fish, I turned to Paddy to advise me. A nice trip to the sporting goods store and we were set. Jordan made it clear to Paddy that he wanted only the best, too bad Nike doesn’t make fishing gear.

So one Saturday morning I took Jordan to the local fishing hole for a test run. It didn’t go as well as planned. There were minnows and gold fish swimming by the banks of the pond. Jordan was more interested in tossing pieces of Power Bait at the fish than casting his line into the pond. After about 15 mins of watching Jordan try to catch the fish with Power Bait and his bare hands, I decided to put an end to the game. All in All, the 2 hrs we spent at the pond were fun and enjoyable. Now I just need to find a FISHING FOR DUMMIES book with pictures. Then maybe Jordan will understand that a fishing pole with bait works better than his bare hands.

A Government Out of Control!!!

2008-09-06T23:01:00.003-06:00

The War in Iraq, The Mortgage Crisis, The Presidential Election....I can continue naming problematic issues but will spare you the reading. Out of all the issues putting the strain on the government and economy that I have never understood is how the welfare and assistance programs function. Granted, there are people that have bad luck and have no control over how their lives play out. This I can understand that the government is there to step in and save and help. What about the people that are lazy or have figured out how to play the system? This abuse is ignored!!! It makes me sick to see people that use their food stamps at the grocery store or gas station to purchase "necessities", only to go hope into a large pimped out SUV or car. How is this possible? Luxuries like this should be earned and not given to people that have to rely on the government to pay for their food and medical needs because they WANT the nice things in life without working for them. Cmon!!!

I wake up every morning and go to work for 8-9 hrs, pay taxes and insurance premiums faithfully out of each pay check. After this I am expected to pay my bills out of my own pocket with no help from the government. So it’s hard to watch people abuse a generous system fund by my tax dollars and other hard working Americans. I have known a few people that have managed to play the system. They too have jobs, but choose for the lesser paying jobs. They want to appear as poor as possible. It’s their choice to make $7-10/hr instead of more. No one hold a gun to their head and robs them of their free agency. If you choose this, you should go without the finer things in life...the nice SUV, Prada handbag, Tag Heuer watch or daily trips to Starbucks.

The government would have millions or even billions if they would spend a little more time and money to prevent and stop the abuse. After all, look at the national debt!! Some of the money save from the abuse could go towards paying down the debt and paying more into SS benefits for the current and future retirees.

OK...I am done; I will step off my soapbox, thanks for listening to me vent. GOD BLESS!!!

Life's Crazy Circle

2008-08-26T21:21:00.003-06:00

Well....I have finally come to the realization that I am getting old. Besides the extra weight I have gain, the thinning hair and a few gray stands of hair that I try tp pluck out. My baby Jordan is starting Full Time Pre-School. What makes things even crazier, his pre-school is in the old Murray Library that Grandma Nancy worked at 30+ years ago. This is the same one that is kiddie-corner from my old pre-school.

It was nice to walk thru Jordan's pre-school and picture the library as it was back in the late 70s and 80s. Feathered hair, bellbottom jeans and other wonderful clothing styles of that time. I counted atleast 6-7 people I knew from high school that were bringing their kids to enroll at the school.

What is it about the hometown that brings people back to raise their kids? I have tried for years to escape the grasps of Utah and the Murray area. Somehow I find myself remembering how good it use to be and wanting the same for my kids. I guess I am doing something right or atleast trying too......

Beer Goggles

2008-08-14T17:24:00.001-06:00

If I wasnt already taken, I would have volunteered for this experiment. I came across this article a few weeks back and forgot to post it.

http://news.yahoo.com/story//livescience/20080814/sc_livescience/peoplereallydolookbetterwhenyoudrink

When Selling Pills to Humans isnt Enough?

2008-08-14T15:49:00.005-06:00

I had a friend show me a story about a new development in the pharmaceutical market. It appears that the wonderful folks at Pfizer Labs (aka legal drug pushers) have developed the world's first diet pill FOR DOGS! The below site shows dogs just like they'd show people on diet products!

http://www.slentrol.com

The Summer of Fun

2008-08-06T19:13:00.006-06:00

I dont know what it is with the summer season, but it seems that its a good time of the year for children to grow and change.

Jordan is the BIG MAN on campus as he started pre-school last month. He has already manage to make some friends and form his own Rat Pack. Lucky for us, he has behaved and managed to stay out of trouble. I guess he is waiting to save the best for when he is in Elementry.

Carter "C Note", has manage to create a name for himself. Borrowing from Patrick vs Braden battle when the much smaller Braden showed Patrick who owned the Mini basketball court. For those that are not familar with this epic battle (I will spare you the details), Braden sent Patrick to the ER with a cracked skull due to a golf club (3 Wood) to the cabasa. One night after Carter had enough of Jordan's harrassment, he waited patiently until Jordan was close by and BAM!!! a smack on the head with a hammer. No ER visit this time since it was just a plastic play hammer, put Jordan thinks twice before he messes will the Lil One.

Below of current pictures of the boys....Enjoy

Bend it Like Who?

2008-07-29T13:41:00.004-06:00

To protect her idenity, Jane Doe managed to hustle $100 from me.

On our recent trip to California to visit Auntie Posh and Uncle David, we were out for a walk with some friends. An idea came up and soon a wager of $100 was made for the first person to complete the feat. I cut out the part where I embarassed myself.
Here is the better attempts

Soccer Donut Stunt

Back in the Saddle AGAIN!!!

2008-07-27T14:30:00.003-06:00

(The old song by Gene Autry, remade by Aerosmith is playing in the back ground as I am getting ready for my game)

After 8 long months of the pitch due to a minor knee injury ( Another proven fact that blondes dont belong playing soccer...lol) I decided to once again lace up the boots, cinch the gloves on and take the field. This time in a more skillful leage than before. The fist game back went well, the knee still needs some work. I think I need to worry about getting in better playing shape then worry about the knee after. Wait...maybe its the extra 30lbs I gained by being inactive.....Does Jenny Craig help overweight soccer players???

Joke of The Day

2008-07-10T19:52:00.001-06:00

A blonde gets a job as a teacher.

Watching the kids play she notices a boy in the field stood by himself while all the other kids are running around having fun with a ball.

She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him.

"Are you ok?" she says

"Yes" he replied.

"You do know that you can go and play with the other kids", she says.

"Its best I stay here" he said.

"But why?" says the blonde.

The boys says "Because I'm the goalie"

Check This Out!!!

2008-07-07T21:35:00.001-06:00

I am the one in the Red shirt.

How I spent My 4th of July Weekend!!!

2008-07-06T23:32:00.002-06:00

I thought I had seen it all. Growing up in the city and all. This weekend I was invited to take in 4th of July festivies in a rural Wyoming town. Yes, the parade are shorter, the festivities different. It was a good culture learning experience.
Here are some of my observations; I hope you find them as amusing as I did.

1. Most floats in the parade consisted of A) A 4x4 truck pulling a trailer or B) A 18 wheeler.
2. The "floats" that consisted of a trailer were decorated in country decor...sagebrush or tumbleweed. Quite the opposite from parades of past in the city with elaborate decorated floats with bright colored paper designs, etc...
3. Maybe half way thru the parade there is a "float" serving beer on tap to all willing parade viewers of age. Yes, Jordan didn’t understand why they would give him some bubbly apple juice.

All in all it was a good experience with the best fireworks display ever. It looked like a clip from a war movie, with Bombs over Bagdad by Outkast playing in the background.

Picture to follow once I find the digital camera.

Dad's Food SUCKS!!!

2008-07-01T22:59:00.002-06:00

I have never claimed to be a cook like Merial or Wolfgang Puck. I do however strive to cook edible meals for my family. After a recent dinner, I think I need to hire a chef or switch to frozen dinners. Lil Carter informed me that my meals were crap and he would find something better to eat. See picture below.

A Proud Moment for a Father

2008-06-16T23:19:00.006-06:00

My boys know how to keep me happy. At a recent session of Jordan's Soccer School the parents were invited to come join the kids on the field. Deidra was manning the camera so took the field. I was shocked to see the lil one following me out. To have both of my boys interested in soccer and becoming professional soccer players was more than I could handle. My boys want to be able to provide the best for me in my Golden Years. Watch out Brooklyn and Cruz....Jordan and Carter are ready to take the pitch with you.

Sacrifice...What does it really mean?

2008-06-09T22:10:00.003-06:00

How you define the word Sacrifice? I search a few dictionaries to come up with the best definition. Sacrifice is defined as “to give of oneself or one's interest for others, do go without or give up something to benefit others".

A friend shared a story that they heard recently of a parent that was unsure if they would have a birthday party for one of their children. Money was tight, the government check was not expected for a few more weeks, but there was money in the "rainy day fund". Was it necessary to withdraw money from the fund? What does one do when given such a difficult decision? For me it’s a no brainer, give the child a well deserved party. Hell....the kid deserves surviving another year is this life. Sacrifice, do what you need to do to have a party. No need to make it glamorous or invite the whole neighborhood. Just something simple. Why would a parent struggle with spending their "rainy day funds" to provide enjoyment and celebration for their child? Greed? Selfishness? Ignorance?

I will step down on my soapbox. Thanks for listening to be vent and get a troubling situation off my chest. GOD BLESS!!!

WENUS, The Word of the Day

2008-05-29T15:14:00.003-06:00

Get your mind out of the gutter. When I heard this word I was thinking of something gross. Today, I learned what the word meant. Interesting....one would have never thought that work would be the perfect enviroment for a educational experience.

Click on this link to learn the proper defination of WENUS. On that note, remember to protect yours. LOL

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=wenus

Nice Shot!!!

2008-05-28T10:01:00.001-06:00

I think this shot could be comparable to a half-court shot in basketball. Way to go Becks!!!

Following in the foorsteps of others

2008-05-24T15:44:00.000-06:00

Without any prompting from others, Jordan decided he wanted to start training for Soccer. As I held back the tears, I enjoyed the moment as a proud father. For once in his young life Jordan is making the right decision. (LOL) I can only hope in a matter of 10 years he will have mastered the game of soccer and will be attracting big name sponsors....if not there is always McDonalds. To be Continued.....

2008 MLS Miracle

2008-04-20T18:45:00.000-06:00

After 3 less than perfect seasons, RSL managed to pull off one of the biggest upsets in Professional Sports History. This trumps the recent (2008) Super Bowl XLII victory for the NY York Giants, Rulon Gardner overpowers Alexander Karelin for Greco-Roman wrestling gold, RSL shut out 4 time MLS Cup winners DC United. RSL soccer 4 goals in 90 minutes and held United to no goals. Things might be finally looking up for the new sports franchise in Utah.

SPRING TIME!!!

2008-04-02T21:22:00.000-06:00

With the passing of the Vernal Equinox, Spring time ushers in a new soccer season. New faces and new hopes!
Jordan was able to attend a team practice for ReAL Salt Lake. He did get teased due to wearing the wrong team jersey. Yet he remained loyal to Uncle Dave.

Spring Retreat

2008-03-17T21:21:00.001-06:00

We escaped the fridged and punishing weather of Salt Lake to relax in the nice, dusty weather of Moab. I guess warmer weather doesnt come without some sacrifice.

During the recent family retreat we went exploring in Arches National Park. Somehow I was talked into hearding the 2 boys up a trail to see the "Delicate" arch. Hearding meant packing Carter and making sure Jordan didnt get lost in the brush chasing lizards and other desert bugs.

Joke of the Day

2008-02-28T17:11:00.000-07:00

These are actual comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were reprimanded but, boy, are these funny!!!

1 Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your son is depriving a village some where of an 'idiot'.
5.Your son sets low personal standards, and then consistently fails to achieve them.
6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child, beat out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning, but the hamster is definitely dead.

These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:

1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."
2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They stretch after awhile."
3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."
4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."
6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"
7. "Yes,sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"
8. "Warning! You want a warning? OK., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on
11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
12. "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."
13. "How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"
14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."
AND THE WINNER IS....
16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."

Money Money Money

2008-02-20T22:21:00.001-07:00

You know you have too much money when you do stuff like this. Click on link

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/01/29/richest-man-in-india-buil_n_83910.html

Just Another Blonde Joke

2008-02-11T22:03:00.000-07:00

Thank You Kelly!!! What would be do if we couldn't poke fun of blondes???

Laugh of the Day

2008-01-31T15:40:00.001-07:00

Psycho-T throwing it down

2008-01-10T21:55:00.000-07:00

Its nice to see a white boy putting the rock down. This clip is almost as nice as Vinsanity in the 2000 Olympics. You be the judge

Ho Ho Ho...Merry Christmas!!!

2007-12-26T21:47:00.000-07:00

This was quite the evenful Christmas. Trying to manage 2 boys ripping open their Christmas gifts. You would think that they were looking for gold. Regardless of the 30 min chaotic event, it was nice to see the boys excited and happy with what Jolly Ol Saint Nick left them.

The Wedding Dance

2007-12-19T21:05:00.000-07:00

I was at my cousin's wedding, when the bride and groom managed to pulled of this dance.

Sympathy Please!!!

2007-12-16T21:53:00.000-07:00

I had the unfortunate luck hurting my knee while stumbling of the curb while being drunk. LOL I recently joined an over 30 Co-Ed Soccer League. During my last game I hurt my knee 1/2 way thru my game. Somehow while making a save, a chic on the other team ran into my leg. I didn’t think much of it. I taped my knee and continued playing. Upon professional evaluation, it was determined that I tore MCL. This was not what I was hoping to here. Because of this I get to take an unexpected break from playing soccer.

The First Snow of the Season

2007-12-02T16:02:00.000-07:00

Well, it snowed yesterday. I guess that would be a bit of an understatement considering that we got about 8 inches of the cold, wet stuff.

I have the joyous opportunity of shoveling snow with Jordan. You would think after living here in Utah for 30 yrs I would know the proper way to clear snow off of the driveway and sidewalk. Wrong!!!

Jordan was the foreman of this simple task. It was comical to see a grown 4 yr old shout out orders on where to shovel and toss the snow. After an hour of slow paced snow removal we had cleared the driveway and the sidewalk.

I have to thank Jack Frost for nipping and Jordan's fingers. At least that was the excuse he gave me when it was time to quit and go inside.

Just Another Blonde Joke

2007-11-26T11:43:00.000-07:00

A body builder picks up a blonde at a bar and takes her home with
him.

He takes off his shirt and the blonde says,
"What a great chest you have."
The body builder tells her, "That's 100 lb. of dynamite, baby."
He takes off his pants and the blonde says,
"What massive calves you have."
The body builder tells her, "That's 100 lb. of dynamite, baby."

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running out of the
a partment screaming in fear.
The body builder puts his clothes back on and chases after her.
He catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment like
that.
The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite
after I saw how short the fuse was."

Oops!!!

2007-11-23T18:08:00.000-07:00

A nice quiet night was interrupted when my nephew wanted to show me how he could hide a penny in his mouth. After some begging and bribing, I was almost able to convince him to spit the penny out. As I went in for an attempt to grab it, Brycen swallowed it because he didn't want me to get it. LMAO!!! As me and Charlie took him to the ER, we had him beleiving that the Drs would have to cut his stomach open to get the penny. As he sat on the Xray table and screamed as the Xray came dow, we finally told him its ok and the Dr will not cut him open.
***Note to Parents....Don't try to make your child regurgitate after swallowing a non-food item. The ER doctor said its better to let the swallowed item run thru the bowels if it is not poisonous.***

A slight Mis-Understanding

2007-11-04T11:33:00.001-07:00

Lulu was a prostitute.

One day there was a raid.

All the prostitutes were lined up outside the police station as they took them in one by one.

As Lulu stood in line, she saw her Grandma coming down the street and was so ashamed, Grandma didn't know her occupation.

Grandma stopped to say hi, and asked what the line was for.

Lulu, saving face, said that the police were giving away fresh oranges to those waiting.

Grandma said wonderful, she loved oranges and got at the end of the line.

When the policeman got to the end and saw her, he was amazed.

He said, "How the heck do you do this at your age?"

She said "I just take out my teeth, rip the skin back and suck 'em dry!"

The cop fainted............

Joke of the Day

2007-10-30T21:52:00.001-06:00

Dentist Check-Up

2007-10-25T22:16:00.000-06:00

Jordan managed to get a clean bill of health.

After a somewhat traumatic experience with his first cavity, Jordan managed to have no cavities. And yes, daddy rewarded him for the positive outcome and saving money too.

New Addition

2007-10-14T23:06:00.000-06:00

So I broke down and gave in.

We got a dog for Jordan. The lil wirey haired dog was given to him on his 4th birthday.

Just after I got done potty training one kid, another comes along.

Good Parenting

2007-10-02T20:02:00.000-06:00

My cute lil neice is growing up. Here is a picture of proud father with his daughter.

What was he thinking???

2007-09-28T08:57:00.000-06:00

It makes no sense that the US Women's Coach would keep a 1st string goalie on the bench during an important game. Hope had gone over 300 minutes without allowing a goal. (That is almost 4 games, 3 of which were shut outs)

Brianna made the start against Brazil because 3 years ago she helped the US defeat Brazil. Why didn't the coach pull her out after the 2nd goal.

Keep your head up Hope. We love you!!!

Child Abuse!!!

2007-09-26T22:06:00.000-06:00

Not Really, But.....

Jordan being young and nieve decided to follow his mom to the nail salon to get a pedicure. Hopefully this habit won't continue

Washing the Dishes

2007-09-18T20:36:00.001-06:00

Finally!!! Jordan has learned to do the dishes. It makes life a bit easier.
Next.....the laundry???

Cute Lil Jordan

2007-09-13T18:49:00.000-06:00

Today Deidra took the boys grocery shopping. Jordan came home with some juice boxes. When he was helping deidra put the food away, he looked in the fridge and was worried that there was no room for the juice. So trying to come up with a way to get the juice boxes in the fridge, he took 2 milk containers out and placed them on the floor next to the fridege. Then there was room for his juice boxes in the fridge.

Washing the dishes........Jordan relized that he was to short to reach the kitchen sink to wash the dishes. So with this quick thinking he took some dishes in to the bathroom and washed them in the bath tub.

Thought of the Day

2007-09-04T23:09:00.001-06:00

MyHotComments

Funeral

2007-08-22T21:43:00.000-06:00

Here are some picture of my father's funeral. It was a very tough thing to do. Especially trying to explain all this to Jordan. He is slowly understanding what happened to Grandpa.

Thanks for all you that have supported my family in our time of need.

RIP..Grandpa

2007-08-16T21:30:00.001-06:00

Well, Yesterday was not a good day for us. We were called to the hospital around 9:30am. Dad had suffered a heart attack at work. The Drs and Medical professionals tried for over 30 mins to get him stabilized and his heart back beating normally. Unfortunately, they were unsuccessful and was declared deceased @ 10:07am.

It came as a shock to the family and his friends. Dad was healthy. Before his heart attack he was joking with his co-workers. We are glad for the time he blessed our lives and others. Thanks Dad we will miss you!!!

Click Here is a link to his obituary:

Movie Recommendation

2007-08-14T23:29:00.000-06:00

For all you King Fu fans out there, Rush Hour 3 is a MUST see. I have not laughed so hard in my life!!! If nothing else, get out of the house and enjoy a good movie.
Hopefully, you will not have a guy above you chompping on his popcorn like he has not had a good meal in days.

http://www.rushhourmovie.com/

Becks makes His MLS Debut

2007-08-09T21:55:00.000-06:00

Uncle David made his much anticipated MLS Debut. After recovering form an ankle injury suffered when playing in Madrid. And the stupid doctors for RM, managed to screw up things that it delayed his debut. Stay Tuned for more highlights thruout the season. Trust me, there will be many!!!

Beating the Champions

2007-08-09T21:52:00.000-06:00

It looks like the Colts lost some glitz and glamour from the Super Bowl. My boys managed to show them not to mess with Texas.

http://www.dallascowboys.com/news.cfm?id=4DA7A94D-08F0-DF32-147C3D9DD9D6AE10

Small Town Wyoming Girl hit the Big Time

2007-08-07T17:44:00.000-06:00

My cute lil neice was selected to go tour the US Capitol. If I remember it right she was only a few students her age to be selected to represent their states at the capitol gathering.

Sweet Brittney has been receiving scholarship offers from Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Peperdine, UNC, just no name a few. She make me a proud uncle.

Jordan in The Mist

2007-08-05T14:40:00.000-06:00

This picture reminds me of the Jane Goodall movie with Sigourney Weaver. Jordan was trying to communicate with the gorilla. He wanted to give the gorilla a "High Five".

WOW!!!

2007-08-03T21:42:00.000-06:00

I am hoping that Jordan and Carter will be interested in soccer. I would love to post a video clip like this of them playing soccer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hG47FDenyXw

Welfare Abuse

2007-08-03T21:34:00.000-06:00

We all know that Government Assistance is to help those in need. Is it there for those people that think they are in need but really don't need or deserve WELFARE?
Personally, I think the welfare system needs to be policed better. I have heard of to many cases where people abuse the system and get away with it. And people wonder why taxes and healthcare costs are rising. HMMMMM.....

Tag I am It

2007-07-31T18:38:00.001-06:00

I guess I have been slacking on internet and blog "lingo". According to my dear sister-in-law, I have been tag or in other words called out to share 7 the people might not know about me.

So as I racked my middle-aged brain on how to go about this, here are the following 7 things about me.

1. If I was on a stranded island, I would only need 3 food items to survived on until help arrived: Coke (the kind you drink), Kettle Corn, and Cookie Dough. It might be hard to make sure it stays cool to avoid e coli or samonella

2. When I was a young Lad in Scotland, I am most bit my tougne off. Just to preface things, when I concentrate I have a tendency to stick out my tougne or bite on it. So the story goes...I was climbing on the clothes washer for some reason. As I made my accent upwards I either lost my footing or grasp on the top of the washer and slipped, biting into my tougne.
I still have the scares to show for it and a rather large tougne (ie Gene Simmons).

3. I share my birthday with a very famous Cicil Rights Leader. Dr Martin Luther King, Jr. It is nice when this day falls on a work day and most generous employers let you take the day off.

4. I managed with the help of my dear mother to reach the rank of an Eagle Scout. This means that I no longer have to go on tretious campouts, build makeshift snow caves or go to door in the fall begging for dontions to support the scouting program.

5. I think I am one of a handfull of people that has manage to be on a mission and see 3 different LDS Presidents serve in that capacity. President Ezra T Benson passed away when I was in the MTC 1994. President Howard W Hunter was appointed to fill the vacancy. Also, making time to come see me before I departed to the Dominican Republic. Shortly there after March 1995, he passed away and President Gordon B Hinkley took his place.

6. I belong to a family where my Grandmother, Mother, and Myself (And Siblings, that graduated from the same High School.

7. Finally, I competed nationally in piano competions until the age of 12. I suffered a injury that forced me to discontinue my piano playing. I did have dreams of become the next Liberace. Only if...........

Its your turn fellow bloggers. YOU HAVE BEEN TAGGED!!!!

Be Careful when Home Teaching!!!

2007-07-26T09:03:00.000-06:00

This is another good reason to maybe bring the bishop along when visiting church members

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=1538236

Tolerant Jazz Fans

2007-07-24T22:05:00.000-06:00

After a 4 year hiatus, I managed to attend a Jazz game. I was fortunate to get free tickets to a Jazz Summer League game. I took Patrick and Kristy. They are diehard Jazz fans.

The game pitted the Jazz against 6 time NBA Champions Chicago Bulls. The Champions managed to beat the hometown favorites. During the game Patrick was worried that I was going to start an uprising because I was cheering for the Bulls. After the game was over and the Jazz fans exited the stands slightly dejected but hopes high that the Jazz could make a run at the NBA championship this season.

New Family Member

2007-07-20T22:05:00.000-06:00

Patrick and Kris adopted this cute blonde toddler. Lil Lupe joined Patrick and Kris on their new home 2 weeks ago. She is a very well behaved Yellow Lab.

Bigfoot or just a Hairy Man???

2007-07-19T09:25:00.000-06:00

People Prepare to Search for Bigfoot

(KSL News) Over the next couple of days a group of people will comb Northern Utah for Bigfoot. The Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization says an area in Northern Utah is the most reliable zone in the state for Sasquatch sightings. For $300, participants help scour the woods for the elusive creature. The group says on all but three of the expeditions they've been close enough to actually hear the Sasquatch, and some say they've actually seen one.

I called the people organizing the event and they did say that with the "entry fee" you get your choice of recreational drugs to help assist you in tracking down this elusive monster. (Just Kidding)

How stupid can One get?

2007-07-11T16:28:00.000-06:00

Click on the link below. Someone forgot to tell him that you can just transfer license plates to whatever vehicle you want.

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=2932509

Back in the Saddle

2007-07-05T22:24:00.000-06:00

At my old age, I have managed to strap on the boots, gloves and trot onto the field. My return was not the best, we lost the game and I managed to get an early escort to the bench with 2 yellow cards. Looks like I still have a little bit of fire left in me.

Mommy Deidra

2007-06-27T20:40:00.000-06:00

Congrats to Mommy Deidra on her recent promotions. Deidra has been promoted from Appointment Coordinator to Floor Instructor. YEAH!!!

Now that she is making big bucks, I might consider quiting or maybe a PT job as a WalMart greeter.

Daddy's Day

2007-06-18T23:22:00.001-06:00

I took a second out of my busy day to pose with my boys. I learned that Jordan can not keep secrets. He was nice enough to tell me what I was getting, but I managed to act surprised.

Experiencing the Scottish Tradition

2007-06-16T22:53:00.000-06:00

This year we initiated two new members to the Scottish Festival.....Carter and Peyton. This tradition was started centuries ago by Grandmas Eva and Nancy.
We are waiting for the 2 boys to get some meat on their bones before we dress them up in their kilts. LOL!!!

Driven to Drinking

2007-06-16T17:18:00.000-06:00

After an arguement over curfew, Jordan ran away. I found him siting under a tree with a bottle of Scottish brew. When I confronted him, he explained that he was just trying to relax and take the edge off. I hope this isn't a glimpse of future problems.

A Dangerous Rivalry

2007-06-04T18:59:00.000-06:00

TALK ABOUT CRAZY!!!!

SAO PAULO, Brazil (AP) -- Two Brazilian soccer fans accused of planning to throw a grenade at a bus full of rival supporters after a league game were arrested.
The two Palmeiras fans were stopped at a highway checkpoint Sunday night following the team's 3-1 loss to Cruzeiro in Sao Paulo, the federal highway police said.
The fans were carrying an American-made grenade and confessed they were going to throw it at the bus taking Cruzeiro fans to the team's hometown of Belo Horizonte, about 340 miles from Sao Paulo, police said.
The Palmeiras fans -- 22-year-old Jefferson Ferreira Lima and 26-year-old Jorge Luiz Sampaio Santos -- had been following the bus since it left Palmeiras' Palestra Italia stadium in Sao Paulo, police said.

Learning at a Young Age

2007-05-30T20:14:00.000-06:00

With the help of Uncle Braden, Jordanhas learned how to mow the lawn. There is still room for approvement. I enjoy sitting in a lawn chair with a cold drink in my hand watching my trophy son learning the steps to becoming a true man. (Sigh)

Girl Problems

2007-05-28T12:41:00.001-06:00

Jordan is learning early on that girls (woman) are difficult to understand.
I guess Jordan's Sweetheart is mad at him for missing a family barbq.
I heard the dog house is a comfy place.

Memorial Day Tribute

2007-05-26T23:33:00.000-06:00

I came across this picture as I was going thru a photo album. With Memorial Day right around the corner I thought this would make a nice blog post.

Thanks Mom and Grammie Eva for sending Jordan and Carter.

***FYI, this picture was taken circa 2000. I wish I still looked this good***

Happy Birthday Cousin Dave!!!

2007-05-02T16:26:00.000-06:00

Today is Uncle David's Birthday. He is 32.

Most of you don't know this....but a year after Jordan was born Our Favorite Soccer Star agreed to be Jordan's Godfather. This was a welcome relief to Me.

Jordan was really excited with Uncle Dave signed with the LA Galaxy. Now Jordan can spend summers in California.

Daily Reminders

2007-05-01T09:30:00.000-06:00

I just love it how children make sure they let their parents are reminded how much they are love. Case in point......

After a long day of work and volunteering for RSL, I made it home. My cute, adorable, loving, precisous son wanted to play with my cell phone. He has done this on several occisions without any problems. This time it was different. For a brief second he was possed by the devil. He thought it would be funny to hide my phone and have me look for it.
So I agreed to play his little game. As I went looking for my phone, Jordan was nice enough to give me some helpful hints, I found my phone. Jordan thought it would be funny to put Daddy's phone on the spider trap. I nice rectangle paperboard with sticky gooo on it.
I wasn't sure if I was suppose to laugh and act surprised or beat his ass. As Jordan ran out of the room to tell Mommie what happened, I sat down and laughed.

Good 'ol fashion ass whooping

2007-04-23T22:01:00.000-06:00

How pathetic???
This is a prime example of the wonderful coaching of Mr. Ellinger

Scoring Summary: CHV -- Maykel Galindo
CHV -- Maykel Galindo
CHV -- Ante Razov
CHV -- Matt Taylor

Chivas USA Real Salt Lake
Total shots: 19 12
Shots on goal: 8 2
Corner kicks: 4 7

Its times like this that the fault falls on the coach for poor player selection.

New Tooth

2007-04-23T21:56:00.000-06:00

Jordan got a cavity filled and they put a silver cap on it. Now he goes around showing off his special silver tooth.

Dirty Players

2007-04-10T20:25:00.000-06:00

As I sat at the scorer's table at mid-field, I was able to get an upclose look at the game and the players. One obervation I made was how easy the FC Dallas players would fall the the ground. It took alot to knock RSL's players to the ground. When playing soocer, does a good player need to be a good actor as well???

2007-04-08T22:11:00.001-06:00

The Devil and the Babe

2007-04-08T22:04:00.000-06:00

This is my pic of the Lion and the Lamb laying down

together. Who says that Big Brothers don't have a soft place in their heart for younger siblings?

Baby Peyton

2007-04-02T19:11:00.000-06:00

PeyPey made his entrance into this world on March 29th @ 4:51pm.

He weighted in at 5 lbs and 17 in long